Does your homeschooler love schoolwork? What if your kid doesn’t want to do school? Is that normal?
Everyone has a bad day. But, sometimes it’s a long string of bad days. And parenting is hard anyway. Homeschooling has a way of taking all our parenting woes and magnifying them.
Overall, we want to say, YES our kids enjoy homeschooling. We certainly want to emphasize and celebrate the successes we have. This is one of the reasons that it is so important to keep good homeschool records. So, that you can see your progress over time. It’s funny how nothing changes from day to day…and then when you look back everything is different.
But, there are just some things in life that we don’t want to do. I don’t want to do the dishes or go to the gym. Some people like that. Not me. I never have. I never will.
Part of what we’re teaching our kids is to do things they don’t necessarily want to do. There are things in life that we don’t like or enjoy. That we’re not especially good at. Things that are hard, but necessary. Things that take practice, every day.
One of my strategies is to “Eat the Frog First.” In other words, do the worst thing first and get it out of the way. So, can enjoy the rest of the day.
We had this discussion recently in our support group. And the advice and encouragement was so fantastic, I wanted to share it publicly. (Note: all comments have given their permission for me to share what they said anonymously).
Question of the Day: Does your kid actually enjoy school at home?
“Does your kid actually enjoy school? I see so many humblebrags in homeschool groups about kids loving school and how much everyone does and how great and wonderful everything is. I’m just wondering how real this is. Because my child does not love school. We have tears multiple times a week. It’s a struggle everyday to get him to focus and cooperate. I’m hoping that this is normal. Help!”
- Soooo normal!! My kids hate school. It seems to go in cycles. For us, I’ve found that taking a break is bad. Then they don’t want to start back even worse. But, at the end of the day, my kids choose homeschooling over public school. We love it in the big picture, but day to day is so hard.
- Same. My son only enjoys math, programming and other tech related things. It’s a huge fight to get him to do anything else. No tears here, just lots of screaming at me that he won’t do his work or live here anymore. He says I’m mean and don’t love him when I assign certain subjects.
- We have one who doesn’t like school and will look for every shortcut he can invent to avoid school. You’re definitely not alone.
The Struggle is REAL
- My oldest is in public school and has the same kind of undesirable attitude toward school/homework and life in general. My youngest homeschooler hates sitting down longer than 15 minutes. He rushes thru so he is free to go do something else.
- Neither of my kids love school either, unless it’s something fun like playing games or some type of experiment. But we can’t do fun things all the time.
- Everyday we struggle. We have a 1.5 hour windo that everything need to be accomplished or he is mentally done. He still spends a lot of that time he is defiant and frustrated. I can only imagine what he would be like in public school all day. That is what keeps me plugging along every day.
You are NOT Alone
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- My 14 year old only loves school when it’s creative things. And socializing. She doesn’t mind reading if it’s a book she picks out that she’s interested in. She a born entrepreneur though. She has a cupcake/baking business. So, I try to incorporate her other subjects through her business.
- I have a strong willed child who could care less about performing or excelling academically. I have learned to school him thru games and focusing on his strongest interests. But, our school day starts with 20=30 minutes of his arguing about EVERYTHING. We take lots of breaks. When we start back on school, there are more groans and arguing. He is an intelligent child and there are no disabilities causing his reluctance. Just his brain needing to argue right now.
- My son hates most things he doesn’t initiate. I try to fill the space with “educational items”I think he might enjoy. Sometimes I try to steer him toward things he has already expressed an interest in. Mostly I follow his lead. I don’t have the energy to struggle.
Hang in There
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- We struggle most days. There is a serious lack of focus and motivation in my kiddo. I try to make our days manageable by spreading his work into weekends and thru the summer. He may complain, but it’s a shorter amount of time each day that he is unhappy. And I point it out to him that doing things you don’t like is part of life. I have found that spreading out the work load gives him more daily freedom to do what he wants. And we are both more content. Homeschooling should be celebrated for its lending to flexibility, which they don’t have that in traditional school.
- My daughter hates school and argues every step of the way. She “loves it” once she’s focused. Then, she learns well and we have fun. But, would she voluntarily do any of this? Nope.
- My 2 boys hated school. They were in public school and hated that. They were both failing. I pulled them out to keep them on track. But, the never have liked doing schoolwork and every day is like pulling teeth. I always remind myself why I do this: so they won’t drop out or flunk out. Now, one child has graduated with good grades and has a decent job where he can work his way up. The other is graduating this year…a year ahead. Now I can look back and see the benefits.
- A lot of days I just remind myself of what will be important in the years ahead. Maybe not that my kids was the best or made the best grades. But, they are learning the value of persevering when it’s hard. Who better to teach your kids than you? Sometimes this parenting and teaching thing is hard. Hang in there and stick with it. Keep asking for encouragement and support along the way. You can do this!
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If you’re struggling with a string of bad days, know that you are not alone. This post is a great example of how a support group can help you get thru the tough times. We have lots of online and in-person support groups here in SC.
Get connected with our Support Groups Directory:
Also try this: Eat the Frog First
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